Lately, it feels like this:
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But really.. it's more like this:
I'm constantly fighting myself to see and trust the big picture. The true reality...and it takes effort... it didn't before.
I'm not really alone. I'm not really jumping off into an abyss... although most of the time I feel like I am.
My PTSD brain sometimes builds a scenario that's worse than the actual moment... I guess trying to keep me safe... most of the time preventing me from doing the things I love.
But not today. Today I took another step in facing my reality.
Legal stuff isn't good to repeat... however, I need to celebrate that I completed another step in my benefit process. And it sucked. But I did it. I had my moments, I had to take a break, but I did it.
I feel I survived a pretty big step... a real step... a leap... with the help of some amazing, supportive friends and a good lawyer.
For others fighting for benefits- be it Veterans or Contractors- we can survive the steps. We can push through the b.s.
We aren't alone.
We aren't alone.
“Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear.”
Why is jumping off cliffs/airplanes/helicopters easy compared to the benefit process? I guess, sometimes, courage comes in the most mundane tasks... like waiting... UGH.
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